The past six months have been challenging in many ways, particularly for teenagers who already tend to struggle with emotional regulation. The following tips can help guide our high school learners through these unique times. How can I help my teenager self-regulate?
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Strategy 1: Teach learners about their brains by looking at “Understanding the Parts of the Brain.” Discuss how the reward center (the limbic system) is fully developed in the teenage brain, which is why teenagers experience emotion so profoundly. Afterward, discuss how the prefrontal cortex is still rapidly developing—the spot that is transforming them from 13 year olds to adults.
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Strategy 2: Help learners connect with their emotional centers. Teach “Checking the Emotional Thermometer” to give students a quick way to gauge the intensity of happiness, sadness, hurt, anger, love, or other feelings. Then discuss how feelings aren’t right or wrong—they just are. The right or wrong part comes into play when people choose what to do with their feelings.
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Strategy 3: Teach the 5-5-5 breathing strategy. Given that emotions are more intense during the teenage years, students need strategies that help them manage stress, anxiety, anger, and other intense feelings. Teach “Using 5-5-5 Breathing to Calm Down.” Afterward, ask students to share stories about situations in their day so far when they could have used such a strategy. Have them watch for situations that arise later in the day and try 5-5-5 breathing.
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Strategy 4: Promote positive self-talk. Help learners recognize negative thoughts, stop them, and replace them with positive thoughts—a first step in self-regulation. Teach “Using Positive Self-Talk.” Discuss how this strategy helps break a negative fixed mindset and develop a positive growth mindset.
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Strategy 5: Help learners set goals. Self-regulation begins in the moment with recognizing moods and dealing with them appropriately. Self-regulation, however, can also grow into the future. Teach “Setting and Reaching Goals.” Discuss how students can set goals in school and beyond. Ask them to think about who they want to become in one month, one year, and five years. Then ask them what doable steps they can take in the short term and long term to reach their goals.
Adapted from k12.thoughtfullearning.com